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Monday
Apr042016

the rules

the rules say:
DON'T RUN WITH SCISSORS.
but what about really sharp, pointy sticks? like chopsticks?
what do they say about those?
it seems like they never updated the rule book.
i think it's the same book they've
been using since scissors were first invented and
sharp things simply didn't exist until then.

the rules also say:
DON'T USE A HAIR DRYER IN THE BATHTUB.
why would you ever do this?

DON'T EAT BEFORE SWIMMING.
what about during?

DON'T RUN NEXT TO THE POOL.
what if i'm being chased by a rapist?

DON'T STICK ANYTHING INTO THE MOUTH OF
SOMEONE HAVING A SEIZURE.
it never occured to me to do this.
now i'm super curious.

DON'T CRY OVER SPILLED MILK.
what if the milk killed my brother?

ALWAYS LET SLEEPING DOS LIE.
what if they're sleeping on your arm and
cutting off the circulation?






 

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