I'm an adult.
I know it sounds weird.
It sounded weird to me at first,
but there's no denying it.
the creases near my eyes,
the thinning hair,
or the birthdate on my driver's license
that gave it away.
It was the fact that i can wear ANYTHING I want...
and mean it.
When you're a kid, and you decide to wear something a bit odd,
you're generally interpreted as some rebellious punk with an
attitude problem or an identity crisis.
But when you're a full grown adult...
hell... you can wear a coon skin cap and people will look at you and wonder:
DID HE COME FROM THE FOREST?
IS HE FROM PENNSYLVANIA?
Or more realistically...
DOES HE WORK AT THE SWISS FAMILY ROBINSON EXHIBIT AT DISNEYLAND?
People will BELIEVE YOU as if you're SERIOUS,
which means in a way, you can actually BE anything you want.
And I love that!! I think it's great!
I love that I can wear scrubs and a doctor's lab coat to a nice restaurant in Dallas
and people will believe it.
I can't count how many times I've heard:
"Help sir! My husband is choking! Doctor! Help!"
Every time this happens, I just have to laugh. I just sit back and laugh and laugh and laugh. And if the guy dies, I stop laughing. I stop laughing and become very serious. Then I lean forward and say:
"Madam, please accept my condolences."
However, if the guy lives, I keep on laughing and eating steak. Such fun. Such good fun.
When I was a kid the entire thing seemed so silly,
but sadly, it's all true:
Age grants respect to a man.
Granted, it's only a little respect.
A few decades ago, age granted a lot more respect than it does today.
But there's still a little respect left to grant, so dammit...
let's all take that respect for granted!